(just FYI, this post is actually a compilation of a couple of drafts that I have saved over the last couple of weeks, so bear with me, there is a point, I think…)
I am not even sure how to begin this post but by saying that in the last few weeks some kind of flood gate has opened. Whether the flood is coming from within me or from without, all I can say at this point is, “isn’t it all the same thing?”
Well, that question in itself is a definite over-simplification and the answer is far more complicated than I could ever try to answer in one blog post, or possibly even in one lifetime for that matter.
It all started a little over a month ago when I began to be confronted with the numbers 666 and 333 over and over again. These numbers have led me down a path with so many synchronicities that I am frankly in a state of wonder. Nonetheless, I am determined to plunge ahead and continue to pull the string that is unraveling the mystery that is my life.
It began one morning when I came to work and had 666 messages in my inbox. For several days afterwards no matter how many emails I received or deleted the number would always fall back at 666. I took notice as 666 is a compelling number that has all kinds of philosophical symbolism.
To back up a bit, a while ago I began some study into ancient Kabbalism. At first this research began as sort of a random offshoot of something else I was studying, and then quickly took over as my main interest. Naturally with the number 666 repeating itself in my face over and over again, I looked into what the significance of that number is in regard to the Kabbalah.
Here is what Wikipedia says about it, for a quick and simple explanation:
“In Kabbalistic Judaism the number 666 represents the creation and perfection of the world. The world was created in 6 days, and there are 6 cardinal directions (North, South, East, West, Up, Down). 6 is also the numerical value of one of the letters of God’s name.”
This explanation immediately made me think of this:
This is a pendant that my mother gave me. This is a piece of sacred geometry made of overlapping circles to form the Flower of Life. They are arranged to form a flower-like pattern with a sixfold symmetry, similar to a hexagon. The center of each circle is on the circumference of six surrounding circles of the same diameter. It is believed that it is from the Flower of Life that the Kabbalist Tree of Life is derived. The Tree of Life is probably the most widely recognized concept of Kabbalah, and therefore was something I had been spending much time studying and contemplating.
There were more appearances of 666 over the next few days that I took note of. At this point I felt like these little synchronicities were little hints, or nudges, to continue on the way I had been going. I took them as small affirmations, you could say.
Fast forward a few weeks to this past weekend. On Saturday night I had some very interesting dreams. They were those dreams that I dream of that “other place” beyond the veil. There was quite a lot going on in these dreams, and I was left with plenty to think about once I woke up in the morning. As I lay in bed dozing (I think), suddenly I found myself, body-less, in this spaceless space of vast whiteness that had no beginning or end. Just a neverending nothing and everything.
In front of me was what I could only describe as a being. It was all white and it looked to be 3D. The only part of it that was not white was one round eye. I think it may have been two eyes, but I had the impression that I was viewing it from the side. This was like nothing I have ever seen before. It was definitely not human, however it felt very intelligent. I had the feeling that it was possibly far more intelligent than myself, even. It was not threatening, it did not make any move towards me, it just sort of floated there looking like it did.
This entire “vision” probably lasted a split second, in all honesty, and when I came to it was that feeling of being shocked or shoved back into my body after being out, astrally roaming wherever I roam. The vision stuck with me through the day and I had an undeniable urge to draw it. I am not an artist, I cannot draw … well, anything, but I drew this being:
It was all white in my vision, but I colored it just for fun after I drew it because it seemed so boring on the page all by itself. After I colored it I closed the sketch book and went on with my day.
Later in the evening my husband found the drawing and was almost ridiculously appreciative of it. He kept telling me how much he liked it and how good it was, to which I more or less responded with, “Really? Are you kidding me? It looks like our 4-year-old drew it!” Unabashed, he has been showing it to everyone that comes over, much to my chagrin. I am really only mentioning his appreciation of it because it just seems strange to me. He does not usually think my drawings are awesome, to put it another way.
Fast forward another few days to this morning. I woke up early and went for my books. Morning is the best time of day for be to get studying in as it’s nearly impossible to concentrate on anything once my son is awake. I pick up where I left off recently about the paths between the Sephirot on the Tree of Life. I had been more or less ignoring the images while I read the text, when suddenly I look at the corner of the page and see this:
Yeah, that doesn’t look AT ALL familiar, does it?? Remember that my drawing was all white, I just chose to color it in for fun.
This symbol represents the path of Aleph:
Now, I am nearly 100% certain that I have never seen this symbol before. It is located toward the end of the book that I am reading and I have not skipped ahead at all. The other books that I have been reading do not really contain illustrations such as this one, as they are more on the history of Kabbalah than on the technicalities of the philosophy.
Rather an interesting coincidence, no? I mean, if I was trying to copy the drawing in the book I would have copied the drawing in the book. I was drawing from memory, a vague, split-second memory….
Anyway, I take it as a sign that I am on the right track with my studies, and now that I get to the end of this post I am not sure what the point is. All I can say is that I seem to be pointed (directed?) down a path of knowledge that is leading to experiences that make me more joyful by the day. I have felt a definite cutting away of excess in every area of my life, breeding more freedoms and deeper understandings. These understandings are being verified every step of the way, in ways like the one above, for which I can only be grateful.
Perhaps there is something to just letting life flow, taking note of the hints along the way to follow them to your destiny… ? (Wow… that was cheesy, and with that thought I am ending this post).